Currency

I know I've said this many times before, but it's worth repeating. I have found Ryan's "currency", in other words what he values enough to use as a reward or punishment if necessary. His "currency" is currency. I've been finding new and interesting ways to use it to get him to behave the way I want. The latest in my arsenal of mommy weapons is the allowance chart. Ryan has certain responsibilities in our house. He sometimes fusses, complains or refuses to do these things. If he refuses he will get a warning and then punishment, but this is stressful for me and him. So I decided to make a chart. I listed all his responsibilities and made boxes for each day. I assigned a cash value to each one and added that to the second to last column. The last column is left blank and at the end of the week we will add all the checks(bonus math practice!) We started last Thursday and that means all the checks were finished yesterday. Today we will add up the amount he has earned. It's worked out pretty well for chores. We both need to work on a few things. I need to work on reminding him of things and he needs to work on remembering or checking the chart. This chart is going to be good for both of us because it will remind me to pay him at the end of the week and not just sporadically through the week.
I saved the best thing about this chart for last. I decided to add a "bonus" section at the bottom. It includes one off things or things that I want him to do, but are not really chores. One of those is putting away his clothes which he won't have the opportunity to do unless I've done laundry, so I didn't count those kinds of things in the total that Ryan *should* get every week. The best thing about this chart by far is this one little row that says, "no teasing Lily." This one is worth the most on the entire chart because I know it is hard for him and because I REALLY want it to work. One of his favorite things in the world to do is tease his sister. It drives me crazy. Every day there would be fussing, screaming, crying and someone would inevitably get hit(sometimes with an object). This past week has been wonderful. Each time Ryan starts getting close to teasing I remind him of the chart and he stops. Sometimes he will even ask me if something is teasing before he does it or if he did something that made Lily fuss. I've heard him many times say to himself or me, "I don't want to tease Lily." He got a check for every day this past week and it has been a such a different environment in our house. Our house used to be full of negative noise from the time Ryan came home from school until dinner and sometimes until bed time. Now it's not necessarily quiet, but the sounds are of playing, laughing, music and dancing. I can handle that kind of noise, I can even enjoy it most of the time.

This is what his chart looked like this week. He was sick for a couple days this week and I never reminded him to do the trash cans, but other than that he did really well.

I love how kids are so literal sometimes.

I just asked Lily, "Whaccha doin', Peanut?"
She replied, "Standing here."

I'll Belax

Lily had gotten herself into quite a pickle this afternoon. She was wearing one of her princess dress ups with her dress up shoes and playing with a bunch of balloons. She had tangled the balloon strings all around her feet and the buckles for the shoes. Somehow some of her dress had frayed and become entangled with all the other mess of knots, etc. All at once she turns toward the bathroom, announces she has to use the potty and falls down because of her entangled feet. She'd made the announcement in that 3 year old way that tells mommy 'if I don't get to go right now you're going to have a mess to clean up!' I immediately sprung into action trying to get her freed from the mess. I got her feet free from the balloons quickly, but the frayed threads from the dress proved difficult to untangle and impossible to break. I looked at her and said, "I need to get some scissors. I'll be right back!" She laid back, put her arms out in this meditative sort of way, closed her eyes and said, "I'll belax." [decoded meaning= I'll relax] This girl cracks me up! Anyway, I got the scissors and cut the strands and she made it to the potty.

I'm off to belax. It's been a long day.

Mixing It Up

What happens when you mix girl toys with boy toys...

Happy Birthday, Lily!

Lily is 3! Jay says she's not a baby anymore. I haven't thought of her as a baby in a long time, but 3 does seem like a big girl age.